By: Selina Pedi-Smith, Pellere Foundation
You know those moments when you’re standing in the middle of your kitchen, staring at nothing, completely forgetting about what you meant to do next… because you have about a hundred things on your to-do list for the day?
Now…it might not look like it, but fun fact: that’s actually the same sort of thing we talked about in the last column, just wrapped in different paper.
Because we’re still trying to decide what matters enough to act on. Not because we’re not sure what needs done, but because everything feels important. Because everything feels like it should be the thing we start with. Because choosing one means not choosing the others – and we don’t want to choose wrong.
So we stand there. Staring at nothing.
It doesn’t just happen in kitchens. Bathrooms, I’m told, are prime locations for this sort of mental freakout. Never happened to me, of course. But I’ve heard it happens.
And it has happened to me – in my kitchen! – for the better part of a year, in terms of how to fix the stormwater issues on my property. (We won’t talk about how it took me a year and a half to pick a backsplash tile for the kitchen, and another year and a half to actually get it put up. I’ve admitted I can overthink!) There are so many things that have to happen – in a specific sequence – that it can be hard to get started at all.
Because if I start over in that corner, then that affects work flow over there. And if I don’t fix this thing first, then that work won’t hold. And if I spend time on that, I might miss the window for this. And what if I pick wrong and waste precious time? What if I get halfway through and realize I should have started somewhere else? What if I finally get started and it rains for two weeks straight?!?
But…the time for overthinking, and worrying, has ended. Because a rental excavator is being delivered this week. A real one; I’m not just staring at road crews and imagining, honest. A Bobcat E-50 with a 24-inch toothed bucket, which sounds very official and slightly intimidating but I Have Got This.
Because now there’s a clock. I have this baby for the next month and I need to make it count. Which, if I’m being honest, is both exciting and mildly terrifying. Because it’s one thing to think through a plan in your head. It’s another thing entirely to have a very large piece of equipment staring in your kitchen window.
So…I’m picking a place to start.
I don’t know yet if it’s the perfect place to start. I don’t know if I’ll get halfway through and realize I should have done something differently. There’s a very real chance I’ll change my mind – and probably question my sanity – several times over the next few weeks.
But I’ll have started. And I’ll know more than I do right now. Especially about, you know…running a digger.
Because waiting, and thinking, and worrying more haven’t given me any new information. They just gave me new potholes to fix in my driveway.
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